Music of Life
by kendricksnow
Summary: "'Well, the two of you said you have children, correct,' I heard Chloe let out a particularly loud cry at the mention of our kids. 'I would suggest that, as a family, you all start learning sign language.'" Futurefic, established Bechloe. What happens when the most musical person Beca Mitchell has ever known starts to lose her hearing? Oneshot, but that could change.


**A/N: Hi! Thanks for clicking. Just a few things I wanted to go over before you started reading. Firstly, this story is not medically accurate. I don't know very much at all about otosclerosis (it was mentioned in passing in my Orientation to Deafness class), but if you're curious about that or other things that cause deafness, I'd be happy to give you some links. :) Secondly, I just wanted to point out that it generally takes longer than a year to learn sign language- Beca & Chloe are not meant to be portrayed as fluent signers in this, just people who can sign well (which is very possible after a year). **

**A/N 2: Thank you to Isabelle for being a wonderful beta and assuring me that this didn't totally stink. You rock. :) Also, I have a tumblr, so if you want to be friends or have any questions you can hit me up there. barack-0bama . tumblr . com.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Pitch Perfect or the characters- duh.**

**Now, off to the story!**

It started slow, the deterioration of Chloe's hearing. Little things, like her asking me to turn the TV up just a few more notches, or playing one of my mixes just a bit too loud on the iPod dock when she showered. If you didn't know Chloe the way I do, you wouldn't think anything of it. But I do know Chloe, down to every last fiber of her being. I've been married to Chloe for 9 years, and dated her for 3 before that, so how could I not? And I know how much Chloe values the beauty of everyday sound- the music of life, she calls it. I know that she values it enough to always insist that everything always be at just the _right_ volume, not so quiet that you can't hear it, but not so loud that it blocks out the rest of the world.

I didn't push too hard at it, though. I didn't pester her; every time I did, she would smile at me, kiss me on the forehead, and insist that nothing was wrong. That I was just overreacting, like I always did. She refused even the thought of losing out on hearing life's music.

x

I don't think it really dawned on her that something was wrong until I walked in the house during my lunch hour one afternoon (I tried to be away from the studio as much as possible, I missed my family too much when I was there) to the sound of a crying toddler coming from the baby monitor. Chloe was asleep on the couch, no doubt tired out from chasing around our 2 year old baby boy, Jackson, all morning. The thing was, though, if there was anything Chloe was more amazing at than singing, it was being a mom. She was so in-tune to our kids, (Sophie, Jackson's 6 year old sister, was still at school when I'd walked in) that it was almost magical. She knew exactly what they needed, and when they needed it. And she always woke up to the sound of them crying. _Always. _I walked into our son's room, picking him up and cradling him to my chest. "Hey, buddy, what's up?" He calmed down after a minute or two, resting his little head on my shoulder. "Wanna go see Momma?" I asked, smiling at him. He giggled, nodding his head and repeating, "Momma, Momma, Momma!" as I walked him out of his bedroom.

"Hey, Becs, I didn't hear you come in." Chloe said as I entered the living room, obviously having woken up from her nap. She smiled when she realized I was carrying Jack. "And how's my favorite boy?" she asked, walking up to us and kissing him on the cheek, and me on the lips. I looked at her nervously, not sure how to approach the topic at hand. I walked over to the couch, putting Jack down on the floor to play with his toys, motioning for Chloe to sit next to me. She curled up beside me, her arm going around my waist, mine instinctively around her shoulders. "Do you want some lunch, babe? I should probably make some for Jackson, too," she said, looking at our little boy with utter adoration.

"He was crying when I came in, Chlo," I whispered, turning a bit so I could look into her eyes.

"What?" she asked, panic washing over her face.

"The baby was crying when I came in. Not anything serious, obviously, I think he just wanted some attention. But he was crying," I said, tightening my grip around her shoulders and pulling her closer.

"I didn't even hear him…" she whispered, tears filling her eyes. "Our son was crying and I didn't even hear him, Beca. He wanted to be held, and I slept through his only way of calling for me. Something awful could have been happening to my baby boy, and I… I didn't hear him calling for me." In all my years of knowing her, I'd never seen my wife look so absolutely heartbroken.

"Hey," I said, pulling her into me, "don't do that to yourself, baby. He's fine, nothing bad has happened to him. But, Chloe… I really think we should go see a doctor about your hearing." I felt her nod against the crook of my neck, and place a soft kiss there. I rubbed her back, kissing the top of her red hair.

"I'm scared, Beca…" she whispered. I could hear the tears in her voice.

"It's going to be okay, sweetheart. Whatever it is, we will get through it together." I tried my best to be comforting, not knowing what laid ahead for my wife.

x

"Otosclerosis?" Chloe spat the word at the doctor, anger and confusion dripping with every syllable. "What on Earth is that? Can it be cured?" I felt the grip on my hand tighten, and I rubbed my thumb across my wife's palm.

"Otosclerosis," the doctor began to explain, looking at the two of us sadly, "is the hardening of the stapes in the middle ear. It causes conductive hearing loss, over varying periods of time. You're at 11 percent hearing loss in your left ear, currently, and fifteen percent in your right- unfortunately, it will only deteriorate further from here."

Chloe looked at me, desperation in her eyes. I gave her hand another squeeze before turning to the doctor, knowing better than to expect Chloe to be able to formulate clear sentences at the moment.

"Is there, um, is there anything that can be done? Anything at all that can be done to fix it?" I asked, silently pleading for the answer that I knew we would not get.

"Well, the short answer is no. As of yet there are no sure-fire cures for hearing loss, especially hearing loss that develops over time. There are, of course, options to give you the best hearing ability possible given the circumstances, Mrs. Mitchell. We can fit you for hearing aids, if you'd like, or even give you cochlear implants. Those do, however, destroy your residual hearing, and it is a big procedure that cannot be undone." The doctor looked at Chloe as she spoke, but Chloe's eyes stayed trained on the floor. I heard her sob softly beside me, and I put my arm around her, pulling her close to me.

"We will have to look into all of the options, obviously," I said to the doctor, trying to be strong for the crying woman in my arms. "Is there anything you suggest we start doing right now?"

"Well, the two of you said you have children, correct?" I heard Chloe let out a particularly loud cry at the mention of our kids. "I would suggest that, as a family, you all start learning sign language."

x

The drive home from the audiologist was, in a word, awful. Chloe sat in the passenger seat, sobs wracking her entire body. My heart ached for my distraught wife, and eventually I couldn't bear to listen to her cry anymore without being able to hold her. As we approached one of our favorite parks, I pulled in, parking our car under a beautiful oak tree in the small car lot.

"This isn't home," she said, looking up when she realized the car was stopped. Her tear-stained face brought tears to my eyes, as well. "I know," I said, unbuckling my seatbelt, and then hers. "I just… come here, Chlo, let me hold you." I felt her crash into me over the center console, my arms wrapping protectively around my beautiful girl. I rubbed circles into her back for what felt like forever, until eventually her sobs started to slow and her breathing began to even out. She lifted her head up, pure anguish on her face.

"I keep," she started, looking into my eyes, "I keep thinking about how eventually, I won't be able to hear your voice anymore. Or Sophie's, or Jack's. How eventually, I won't be able to hear the mixes you make for me, or hear the kids call me 'momma,' or be able to sing our babies to sleep. Or be able to sing _at all_," Her voice cracked at the mention of singing, fresh tears sprouting in both her eyes and mine. "I'm afraid of this being too hard on us. That after all of these years together, this will be the thing that cracks us." I pulled her tighter to me, peppering kisses wherever I could reach.

"You know that I love you no matter what, right?" I said, grabbing her chin and leading her so she was looking into my eyes. "I've loved you since the day I saw you at the activities fair. I love you more than anything in this world. You know me better than anyone on this planet. You make me laugh, you always support my dreams, and you are the best person I could ever ask to raise a family with. You even," I smile, trying to lighten the mood, "manage to crack my badass image on the regular." I saw a grin start to pull at her lips, but the pain was far from gone on her face. "But most importantly, Chloe, you pick me up when I'm down. You're by my side no matter what happens, and the day I married you I promised to do the same thing for you. I'm not going anywhere, okay? Not now, not ever. We will get through this, and we will come out stronger on the other end. Just like we always have. I need you to believe that, alright?" After my speech, I hugged her tightly, placing a soft kiss on her lips. "I love you. And nothing is ever going to stop me from doing that."

"Thank you," she whispered, looking at me. "I really needed you to say that."

"I was just being honest," I whispered back. "Are you ready to head home? The kids probably miss you."

"And you," she said, moving back into her seat. "But yeah. I really just need to hear my wife and babies laugh right now."

x

The next year of our marriage was spent in a flurry of constant singing, impromptu living room concerts for our kids, and extra "I love you"s being passed around ("so I never forget how it sounds when you say it," Chloe would whisper at night, kissing me before going to bed). I had even talked to the owner of the recording studio I produced out of, getting him to agree to allowing me to bring Chloe in to record tracks of her singing, reading stories, and just talking to our kids. Out of all of this, I knew that the thing that hurt her the most was knowing that one day, she wouldn't be able to hear her own voice, therefore might not be able to vocalize to our children anymore. Recording the tracks, it seemed, brought her at least a small bit of peace, and she had even made me step out of the room a few times so that she could record tracks for me, as well. I tried to not let on to how scared all of this made me, but, of course, Chloe saw straight through my tough girl image. She told me that now, if I ever needed to hear her tell me she loved me, I could. "I don't need to hear it. I can feel it. You, Chloe, _you're_ the music, and I don't need to hear you to know it's there," I would tell her, trying my hardest to portray my honesty not just in my voice, but in my facial expressions as well (something that, I learned, was very important when it comes to sign language).

Learning sign language proved to be extremely rewarding for our family. In the time after her diagnosis, Chloe's hearing did, as we knew it would, decrease quite rapidly, which put a pressure on us to learn the language as fast as possible. We hired a tutor to work with Sophie and Jackson for two hours, three days a week, teaching them to sign. Chloe and I enrolled in an ASL course at the local community center that ran at the same time, and soon, we were all signing quite well. Chloe still used her voice often, but was not afraid to communicate with her hands when she needed to. The grace she carried when dealing with her hearing loss was remarkable, and though there were quite a few break downs, overall she handled it far better than I would ever even imagine being able to.

"I never thought I could fall more in love with you than I already was, but this past year you have once again proven me wrong," I said to her the night before her one-year check up at the audiologist, signing as I spoke. "You're amazing." I signed, turning off my voice. Check ups, which happened every three months, were the hardest things to get through in all of this for my wonderful wife. The bad news of knowing her hearing ability was only continuing to lessen terrified her, and I always tried my hardest to be supportive.

"Thank you," she signed back, smiling at me. She walked up to me, burying her face in the crook of my neck. "I'm scared for tomorrow." She whispered, pulling me closer to her. I lifted her face up so she could see me (she could no longer communicate with people without being able to see their mouths moving, so whispering back was not an option).

"Whatever the doctor says tomorrow, no matter how much your hearing has decreased in the last three months, it is going to be fine. You have been phenomenal through all of this, and our family has only gotten stronger. We've got this, Chloe," I said, giving her a reassuring smile at the end.

"Have I ever told you how perfect you are?" She signed, smiling at me. I nodded, signing back, "You've mentioned it before." She laughed, pulling me in for a kiss.

"How about I show you?" she whispered, giggling as her hands went to rest under my pajama top. God, I loved this woman.

x

"Well, Mrs. Mitchell, tests show that you have 75 percent hearing loss in your right ear, and 62 percent in your left." The doctor read off of Chloe's chart, an interpreter signing beside her. "I know we have talked about cochlear implants before, is that something you and your family have looked into?"

"Yes," Chloe signed back, the interpreter voicing for her. "Yes, and I don't think they're right for me. I've researched it, and it just doesn't sound like a good fit." Chloe lowered her hands for a moment, looking at me before she raised them again. "Besides," she signed, smiling brightly at me, "I've learned that you don't need to hear the music of life to know it's there. You can feel it."

**A/N: If you got this far, thank you so much for reading! I'm not sure if I'm going to continue this (Isabelle wants me to), so if you like it enough for me to write a second chapter, please let me know! Have a perfect day. x**


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